To whoever that translated this pool, please have a friend or family member confirm the grammar before finalizing.
Paracite made the note that you changed, and unless there was something wrong with the Japanese->English part of it, it was fine. Whether it fits into a style guide or was colloquial I don't know, but I know it's common to structure a question that way.
Going along with the spirit, though, I fixed your lack of commas and undercase "I" on post #1779398.