Lesson learned: if you want to know more about someone you have a crush on, you probably shouldn't begin with their closest and oldest friend.
Those are valuable books, so please be careful.
Oof!
Umm, excuse me...
You said you were her friend, but...What is she like, usually?AahHer.She eats other people's food...Loiters around naked after a bath...And her farts really smell, too.